


Breathe For Me

by orphan_account



Series: Marvel Fics [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Spoilers, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Panic Attacks, Post-Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-22
Updated: 2018-10-22
Packaged: 2019-08-05 15:37:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,060
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16370354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: "Just breathe, Tony. I'm here"He's here.Always.





	Breathe For Me

**Author's Note:**

> Sorry guys, I wrote this at like 1 am and I'm half asleep.

He always thought that breathing was weird; you suck in air and hold it in, only to release it a second later. All thanks to your lungs. And your blood which pumped around your body, which kept you alive, all thanks to your heart.

Hah.

Hearts are overrated.

Who needs one, certainly not Tony fucking Stark.

That's what he always thought, following in the great footsteps that are Howard Stark's. 

He always said, "The heart is always the problem, my boy. If you use it too much, then you'll be vulnerable, and I'll be dammed if my son is going to be weak." 

Starks are not weak.

Howard made him repeat it over and over again, like a mantra. He repeated it until he became sick of it... And then he repeated it some more.

Starks don't have hearts.

That was another one of Howard's favourites, and Tony was starting to believe it... That was until a hole was carved into his chest.

And, by god, is he glad that he has one now. You know, they always say that when you nearly die, you always learn to appreciate all the little things in life. Like for instance, donuts (he wanted to personally thank the, quite frankly, genius who invented these delicious treats); coffee (that was pretty self explanatory); cheeseburgers (like c'mon who doesn't  love a grease filled slab of meat between two stale pieces of bread) but he loves most of all, well maybe not more than coffee, his boyfriend Stephen Strange.

He could spend hours talking about him, and has done before. He loves that Stephen knows exactly when enough is enough, like when Tony is on his weekly, coffee filled, building spree, which may or may not last for 51 hours at a time. Stephen always portals into the lab and whisks him away to bed and Tony, who at this point is half asleep and has drank half his weight in coffee, is too comfortable wrapped in Stephen's arms to do anything about it.

He always wakes up all warm and snuggled into Stephen's arms and he can't think of anywhere else that he'd rather be. Well, he'd rather be drinking coffee, but this is a close second.

Most if all; Tony loves that Stephen is always, and will always be, there for him. From the day that he met him, he had this strange, haha get it? Strange as in... Whatever, feeling that they'd be together, whether they liked it or not, and from their first meeting, it was definitely an 'or not' kinda situation.

Although, he had to kind of admit that he did get a little turned on when cloaky, and he really has to stop giving pet names to everything, slapped his ass. Not to mention that, not so subtle, wink, like what the fuck was that? It was like Stephen was trying to turn him on.

Yeah he had a very, very, mixed vibe from him. Being the ninja that he is, he got stabbed, which, quite frankly, was a little rude, like that big purple grape thing didn't even buy him lunch first.

But to be fair, getting stabbed, inadvertently, got him laid, so he definitely had to thank his ninja like reflexes.

God, thinking about it now was bringing up some bad, bad, memories, but he pushed through them.

I'll be dammed if my son is going to be weak.

Well, Howard would be dammed alright, dammed straight to hell, and he wishes that he could say that to Howard's hard face, which somehow was always laced with disappointment.

He laughed, but it was caught in his throat, a strangled noise coming put instead. It was pitiful how easily these things could be triggered; the smallest thing, setting off his worst nightmares.

It's weird how things change.

He remembers that his worst nightmare was the  'team', which, now that he thinks about it, wasn't much of a team, dying whilst he could do nothing.

Now, it's... Well, you can guess. The people that he cares most about in the world, Stephen and Peter, all turning into dust before his very eyes and, in Peter's case, his arms.

When he got them back, he cried, he let everything out. The hurt, the betrayal, the loneliness and, worst of all, the guilt.

He had more panic attacks in that couple of months, than he had done in his whole life. Each one, without having anyone to ground you, feeling like his heart, or what was left of it, was being yanked and pulled and twisted and crushed.

He remembered gasping for breath, and yes breath. That thing that you do with your lungs, and all he could hear was the blood rushing to his ears. Blood. It was pumped around your body, by your heart. 

He had a heart. 

Whoops bad choice. Now he remembers when he was kidnapped in Afghanistan, god the water and he. Just. Couldn't. Breathe.

This one is bad, he knows it.

Even though all of that was the past, he still hangs into it, like a baby to their mother. He just needs one thing; the only thing that can stabilise even the worst of panic attacks. Stephen Strange.

JARVIS is already calling for him, and he smiles, as much as he can, because his baby's all grown up, and before he knows it, rough scarred hands are placed him his own.

"—ony! Tony! Listen to me, baby. Don't worry I'm here for you, just breathe. That's it, nice long deep breaths." 

He finds himself looking into Stephen's beautiful, beautiful, eyes, and... did he tell you that Stephen's eyes are beautiful, because god they are.

He let's out a strangled gasp, because he just can't loose them again. He can't.

And it's like Stephen's reading his mind because he's whisperings, "Don't worry Tony. I'm not going anywhere, I'm here with you. Right here, right now.

Right here. 

Right now.

He's here.

He can feel his heart beat slowing and his breath returning gradually. 

"That's it. Just breathe, everything will be just fine, 'cause I'm here, I'm here and I'm not leaving, you can count on that."

Not leaving.

Tony smiles, because words cannot describe just how much he loved his boyfriend Stephen Strange. 

He loves him, and he'll love him for the rest of his life.


End file.
